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Coping with an Abusive Spouse, and Parent, in your Marriage

The American Psychiatric Association defines 10 personality disorders in its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).   These disorders are grouped into 3 clusters: Cluster A: (Odd, Bizarre), Eccentric, Paranoid, Schizoid; Cluster B: (Dramatic, Erratic):  Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissistic; Cluster C: (Anxious, Fearful): Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-Compulsive.

(For a comprehensive description of personality disorders described in the DSM-5 click on this link:   https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201205/the-10-personality-disorders)

 

Family court proceedings where child custody disputes include family violence and abuse most often involve a spouse (parent) who exhibits Cluster B personality disorder behavior, primarily Borderline PD,  and Narcissistic PD.  I have addressed this issue in my posting entitled: “Coping with Personality Disorders and Mental Illness in Divorce and Custody Disputes.”

 

I have also decided to include several articles in our Family Law Resource Library addressing issues faced by victims of abusive spouses who often feel trapped, threatened, abused in fact,  and helpless to change circumstances within their existing family situation.  These articles are intended to help with understanding the nature of mental disorders, to provide tips for coping with abusive partners,  to offer guidance regarding legal and medical resources that may be helpful or necessary, and to suggest practical advice to help victims protect and take care of themselves and their children.

 

In all cases, I would emphasize the importance of using legal, law enforcement, health,  and mental health systems as appropriate and necessary where family violence is an issue.  Support systems are in place to help you and your family and you should never feel that you must face family violence alone, that you should be expected to solve family abuse caused by a violent spouse, or that you will be able to cure a partner with a personality disorder.

 

I hope you find these articles helpful.

 

8 Best Tips for How to Cope With a Loved One’s Borderline Personality Disorder – Bridges to Recovery

Bridges to Recovery › blog › 8-best-tips-…

Nov 14, 2017 · Learning how to cope with your loved one’s borderline personality disorder can help you create a stronger relationship while taking steps toward recovery.

https://www.bridgestorecovery.com/blog/8-best-tips-how-to-cope-loved-ones-borderline-personality-disorder/

 

Understanding Personality Disorders in Relationships,  Counseling Resource

CounsellingResource.com › self-help › u…

Dec 20, 2014 · This article explains what it is like to be dealing with a personality disorder and it offers tips for victims. https://counsellingresource.com/therapy/self-help/understanding/

 

The Stockholm Syndrome, Loving an Abuser

Beginning with a description of how bonds form between victim and abuser, the article offers suggestions for friends and family of victims.

 

https://counsellingresource.com/therapy/self-help/stockholm/

 

Identifying Losers, Controllers and Abusers in Relationships, 

This article identifies characteristics of abusing and controlling partners  and provides a manner in which women and men can identify damaging relationships

https://counsellingresource.com/therapy/self-help/loser/

 

10 Signs You Are Married to Someone with a Personality Disorder

How do you know if your spouse truly has a personality disorder?

Exhausted Woman – Psych Central Professional

Psych Central › pro › 2016/07 › 10-signs…

 

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhausted-woman/2016/07/10-signs-you-are-married-to-someone-with-a-personality-disorder/

 

Are You Trapped in a Relationship with Someone Suffering From BPD? – The Good Men Project

The Good Men Project › sex-relationships

Mar 25, 2017 · Borderline Personality Disorder can be the elephant in the room that few can identify and no one wants to talk about … Here are a couple of ways you can identify if your partner might be suffering from BPD.

https://goodmenproject.com/sex-relationships/trapped-relationship-someone-suffering-bpd-dg/